Thursday, February 7, 2008

Sad/Glad

Today was kind of a hard day for me. Dan is not feeling well, so I had all the birthday preparations to take care of on my own. I know a lot of moms do most of the work involved in taking care of the kids and the house, but Dan really does a lot. So to have him out of commission was a big deal. I was very stressed out. And then I was sad.

I usually get sad around Drew's birthday. I guess it's just a reminder of the shock we felt when we first learned of his condition and all that it would take to keep him with us. But I don't want to be sad! I want to be happy. I have a beautiful son, with a beautiful heart, and I would not change the way he is. I love him. It's not that I start thinking about that time in the hospital and the surgeries and the despair AND THEN feel sad. I just feel sad. Without thinking about anything. A friend of mine explained it to me like this. Your body just remembers. It's like seasons. A certain time will come around and my body remembers what it felt like. Anyway, since this typically happens around Drew's birthday I have been dreading it. I have been anxious in anticipation of it happening. So I'm hoping that was it and it's over.

Luckily I have a wonderful friend who graciously came over this afternoon and helped me out. She made more cupcakes, decorated them, helped me fill the favor boxes, get some dinosaur games ready, and prepare food. She also entertained and loved my children. She did all that while being 9 months pregnant and ready to have her baby any minute. Am I lucky to have a friend like that, or what?!

4 comments:

Kathy said...

Sorry to hear that Dan's not feeling well...that's so great that he's such a helper!! Perfect husbands...i love it! And the party pics were adorable! I loved the dinosaur cupcakes...you did great!
It is nice to have friends like that close by...a hug in person and another ear to listen always makes a world of difference.
I hope you have a fun and festive weekend...ENJOY it!!!

Kate said...

did you delete my comment?? or was there a mistake on my end?

Vanessa said...

I am so sorry to hear Dan isn't feeling well. Robert is such a help to me too and when he isn't around or feeling well it makes a big difference. About your moods, I think we all go through that. Your human and what you experience stays with you forever. I know its hard because its around Drew's birthday. I'm so glad you have a friend to help get you through these days. I have one too and it makes the world of a difference. I wish I was there to give you a big hug!!

Lexi said...

I hope that you guys are having a great Saturday!!!!